I love a clean, organized house. In fact, I am the kind of person that requires a clean, organized house. It is hard for me to think, plan, or execute anything if there is disorder all around me.
It is the same way in my classroom. I don't think I could ever be a kindergarten teacher because of this! I do love organized chaos, however. And as a teacher, there is plenty of organized chaos during art lessons, math manipulatives time, or silent reading with students all over the floor cuddling with blankets, pillows and books.
I have always prided myself on how well my surroundings look. Last week during my devotion time, however, God pointed out something very humbling to me. In James 3:16 it says, "For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every evil thing." This scripture is tied to others talking about Faith. Faith that produces Wisdom. When we are in a place where we are leaning first on God, then we can rest in Him knowing He will take care of our needs. In this place, peace will be found and there is no need for jealousy.
Lately, I have been missing time with my husband. His daughter, Jaycie, was here for two weeks, so they spent some wonderful time together. His work has been keeping him away from home until late in the evening. Both of us fall asleep way too early. He gets up before I do and is usually gone. Lots of valid reasons why we haven't had time alone!
But.
Little bits of resentment started to creep into my heart against all the things that intruded on our time alone. Did I mention we have a one year old as well! But, during my devotion, God shined the light on this as jealousy which brings disorder on the inside! It's hard to live an uncluttered life with disorder ruling the nest!
As God so patiently pointed out, as I begin to pray for time with my husband, time will present itself. Rather than be jealous, be thankful for his children, work, and abilities to make a nice home for us. As we turn our hearts around and align them with God's will, peace always follows!
Tonight we are going out on a date night! We love the show "Hell's Kitchen", and we will be dining at London, Gordon Ramsey's restaurant. I'm looking forward to this time alone! Did I mention that he is leaving Saturday for Alaska? He'll be gone for 6 weeks - Oh mercy.
Monday, August 4, 2008
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